One Eyed Parrot Dance Club

If it don't seem like it's worth the effort, it probably ain't.

A man who wants to loan you a slicker when it ain't rainin' ain't doin' much for you.

When you get where your goin', the first thing to do is to take care of the horse you rode in on.

Timing has a lot to do with the outcome of a rain dance.

Never take another mans bet. He wouldn't offer it if he didn't know somethin' you don't.

The length of the conversation don't say nothin' about a man's intellect.

No matter who says what, don't believe it if it don't make sense.

Don't never interfere with something that ain't bothering you none.

Never kick a fresh turd on a hot day.

If you find yourself in a hole, the first thing you gotta do is stop diggin'.

The basics of ropin' are a good sense of rhythm, good timin' and an eye for distance.You might also wanta keep this in

mind when your two-steppin' around the dance floor.

Never run from a fight. If your gonna get hit, it's better to take it in the front than in the back, and it looks better.

Generally speakin' fancy titles and night shirts are a waste of time.

The easiest way to eat crow is when its still warm. The colder it gets the harder it is to swaller.

Never ask a barber if he thinks you need a haircut.

Good judgment comes from experience, and that comes from a lot of bad judgment.

Never grumble. It makes you about as welcome as a sidewinder in a cow camp.

Generally you ain't learnin' nothin' when your mouth's a-jawin'.

Makin' it in life is kinda like bustin' bronco's, you're gonna get thrown alot. The simple secret is to keep getting back on.

Remain independent of any source of income that will deny you your personal liberities.

Never drop your gun to hug a grizzly.

Trust everyone in the game but always cut the cards.

The best sermons are lived, not preached.

A womans heart is like a campfire. If you don't tend to it regular you'll soon lose it.

It doesn't matter so much how long of a ride you have, as how well you ride it.

Remember, even a kick in the caboose is a step forward.

There are two theories about arguin' with a woman. Neither one works.

Don't get mad at people who know more than you. It ain't their fault.

There's no place around the campfire for a quiters blanket.

Only a buzzard feeds on his friends.

If you wanta have a drink or two that's alright but don't wear out you boot soles on the brass rail.

Never miss a good chance to shut up.